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The IAU steps in...

Presented with the immediate urgency of the situation many proposals are floated to establish the definition of a planet:

  1. "Orbiting a star" excludes moons...

  2. "Can't have a nuclear core" will exclude binary stars as extra-solar planets...

  3. "Needs to be round" excludes most asteroids...

    • ...but would include Ceres and Eris, maybe even Charon (as a "binary planet").
    • ...no, wait, that would include 53 new planets! Rocky bodies become round at roughly 800 km diameter, but icy bodies become round at only 300 km.

  • Maybe there needs to be something to exclude all added asteroids and Kuiper Belt objects...